Friday, May 25, 2012

War of the words. Or so it says. Book review of 'It's you move, Wordfreak!'


Book written by Falgun Kothari. Review by A little Amused but mostly Confused Bystander
As a reader , a writer and in general a human being with a love for words, I was eager to review this book which used scrabble to create a story. I hastily put together some big 7 letter words for the review incase anyone was going to score me. And that sounds a little wrong.
Anyhoo, the lead characters are Wordfreak and Worddiva who are falling in love from the first page of the book. They live in Mumbai and they chat online. They also live alone which all characters in books nowadays somehow manage while I still struggle to buy my own underwear. The book opens on the eve of a date. Let me put a few things straight here. The back of the book reads (which I am assuming everyone reads first) like these two Word players are totally into each other. Allow me to quote, “Wordfreak and Worddiva hit it off right form their first online Scrabble game. “ So, technically, though the back of the book says otherwise, this isn’t a blind date between these two letter and vocabulary-rich individuals.
The book starts of interestingly enough. The protagonists take their online, ,due to the lack of a better word,  ‘thingy’ offline. Alisha Menon is a divorce lawyer. Aryan Chawla makes green buildings. Which you may not misunderstand as buildings painted green or buildings that are like the Hulk but must understand as environment-friendly brick and mortar structures. Back to the book, the date is ideal, they both are ideal, looks are ideal, ideals are ideal and everything is great. At this point, I think the writer should have moved on. But, she doesn't. Much is explained about which body part is doing cartwheels, which one is sweaty and how absolutely gorgeous the other person is. Because you know people who think they are ugly and fat with no life aren’t the ones on the net at 3am in the morning. The gorgeous ones with muscled boyfriends in tow generally have such intellectual pursuits. No offense to anyone.
Our lead characters gorgeous as they are apparently have never had previous relationships. So it’s all hunky-dory and sexy. Then, somewhere along the line Falguni Kothari (the author) realizes there isn’t much happening in the story while the reader has already fallen into deep slumber. So, she jolts the characters out of their boring life and brings a nice past life issues angle into it.
To briefly go over this again. Boy meets girl. Boy and girl fall in love Boy meets girls family. Screeching halt. Really, in India? Before we even know the guy properly? Apparently, it's a norm that the minute you have some interest in some guy you will tell you mom who will quickly order you and boy to come home. Moving on, girl meets boy’s family. Sundry characters are introduced. Most of these are novel characters. Happy, chilled out nani. Cool, back-thumping uncle etc.
Somewhere along, Aryan develops issues and Alisha must solve them in the manner that all women in the world solve, well, everything. They talk, then he runs away from here, then they cold shoulder each other and then they talk and everyone is happy. There is a choreographed dance sequence in the end. Not really.

Nothing exceptional here but if you have been reading Chetan Bhagat, you will probably think this is literature. Not a very different storyline but should keep you reading. Take it to a government office where you know you are going to be waiting pretty long to get a pipe in your house fixed.
Don't get fooled by the title though. Except 3 minutes in reading time, no part of the book makes any reference whatsoever to the totally awesome game of Scrabble. What a waste of my triple word score!

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Tuesday, May 15, 2012

Does this not enrage you?


How are we so complacent?
As Indians we are either asleep right now or are smoking something so potent we don’t really care. Actually, the fact that we don’t really care isn’t new or untrue. But, here as we park our bums on cushy chairs every day, our country is struggling in every aspect. Does it not enrage you that this is the government we chose? That we are looking like a bunch of monkeys to the world around us? That this is not affecting only our economy but our reputation?
Here are 5 sins of a government that is a tyrant and dense, a combination that caused a World War the last time it happened.  Every Indian, rich, poor, adult, young, urban, rural should feel strongly about these things and decide how much anger should dwell within.

Pride: Air India nose dives.
For the past few years, Air India has been incurring losses despite government bailout. Losses of upto Rs.28,000 crores have been incurred. This is our NATIONAL carrier. I am sure there are tonnes of us that are willing to take it just for the sake of our country but we alone cannot make this work. How can an airline which was once one of the best carriers in the world (top 5 apparently) be sputtering for breath? What is the government doing? Far smaller economies are doing better in this sector than us. Yes, this does affect us on a daily basis. But, does this not enrage you?

Greed: Pocket fires in economic crises
We are one of the nations the world is looking at and we are making a complete fool out of ourselves. A productive economy is teetering and unsteady on its feet. You could get Rs. 54 for one dollar just yesterday. We are a BRIC country – touted as the next decade’s super economies and again we are a mere caricature of good governance. Fiscal deficits are huge and foreign exchange reserves are so low that we can pay for imports only for the next 6 months. Yep, all this planning that our government has done will barely see us through 6 months.  What is the government doing? Does it not cheese you off that every day we are paying a little more for basic comforts because of this? Does this not enrage you?

Wrath: Comic disbelief
Take a look at the first two points. You would think that our government would be quaking in its boots. Turns out, not at all. What do we use the parliament for instead? Oh, for discussion about a cartoon. The said cartoon was published when the person in question (who is being made fun of) was alive and even he knew this was in jest. Some donkeys years later, a stupid, fucked up parliament breaks up a session about this.  Heads roll, resignations are given and apologies are muttered. The sorry state of the country stays the same. The weakened, surppressed classes aren’t better off and Ambedkar is like a demi-god to them. The education, barring this cartoon, will continue to be a business and is possibly one of the most lucrative avenues in the whole country right now. Does this utter waste of our money and time not stun you? Why are you silent? Does this not enrage you?

Sloth: Heading nowhere
This is one of the sins which means that you neglect the duties you are suppose to do. And how well we score on this front. Right now, there was 21 Public Sector companies that are headed by no one. Yup, no one to show them the way. They are all without a full time Chairman and Managing Director. These are the companies that are supposed to balance out the capitalist effects of privatization. Clearly, this is not a talking point. Such a sham this. When a country needs efficient and sharp planning to cut costs and improve welfare, the very bodies that are suppose to being doing this are floating around headless. Does this not bug you? Does this not enrage you?

Gluttony: A law system that has been spat out
A minister who has taken thousands of crores of rupees is let off on bail and so is a young driver who killed a pregnant woman. Our law system is at its best a joke and its worse the place where even terrorists feel safe. The government tells us that we can’t pin down a crime on anyone and even if we do it won’t take much to bail him/her out. We are a country where the price of a crime is paid by the victim with either a life or loss of money while the perpetrator will either walk free or serve a rudimentary sentence.  Who are we, the citizens of India, to turn to? Do we stare from the sidelines and hope the splatters of a crime don’t dirty our clothes or do we pitch in and get embroiled in years of harassment. Why are our choices so limited? We are a democracy. We have rights and not only duties. We pay taxes and we should demand returns. Does this not enrage you?